Antidepressant Red Velvet Cake Pops
You eat red velvet for the cream cheese frosting and enjoy the fact that the bright slice, in traditional cake form, is many times the size of your face. You don’t eat red velvet to pick apart what it’s actually made from, because I really didn’t know until I made these cake pops for yet another Valentine’s Day alone in bed with carbs and feelings. They say red velvet is a Southern staple, but I happen to think it’s a depression staple, along with vodka and the overwhelming urge to slap people on the NYC subway. As a courtesy to yourself and others, stick with the red velvet cake. It will make you much happier, at least temporarily.
Ingredients
FOR THE RED VELVET CAKE
- 2½ cups cake flour
- 1 teaspoon fine sea salt
- 1¼ teaspoons baking soda
- 2 tablespoons unsweetened Dutch-process cocoa powder
- 1½ cups granulated sugar
- 1½ cups canola oil
- 2 eggs at room temperature
- 1½ teaspoons vanilla extract
- 1 cup buttermilk at room temperature
- 2 teaspoons distilled white vinegar
- 1 tablespoon red gel food coloring
FOR THE CREAM CHEESE FROSTING
- 8 ounces cream cheese at room temperature
- 5 tablespoons unsalted butter at room temperature
- 1 teaspoon kosher salt
- 1¾ cups confectioners’ sugar
- 2 teaspoons vanilla extract
- 1 bag white Candy Melts or 12 ounces white chocolate chips
- 2 tablespoons canola oil
- Lollipop sticks
- Red sprinkles
- Styrofoam block
Instructions
- Preheat the oven to 350ºF.
- Coat two 9-inch cake pans with nonstick spray, line the bottoms with parchment paper, then spray again.
- First make the red velvet cake: In a large bowl, sift together the flour, salt, baking soda, cocoa powder, and granulated sugar.
- In the bowl of a stand mixer fitted with the paddle attachment, combine the canola oil, eggs, vanilla, buttermilk, vinegar, and food coloring.
- With the mixer on low speed, gradually add the dry ingredients to the wet ingredients and mix until they are just combined.
- Divide the batter evenly between the prepared cake pans and bake for about 35 minutes.
- Remove from the oven and allow to cool in the pans for 10 minutes before flipping the cakes out onto a wire rack to cool completely.
- Discard the parchment.
- Meanwhile, make the cream cheese frosting: In the bowl of a stand mixer fitted with the whisk attachment, combine the cream cheese, butter, and salt.
- Beat on medium-high speed until light and fluffy.
- Gradually add the confectioners’ sugar and beat until incorporated, scraping down the sides of the bowl as necessary.
- Add the vanilla and beat to combine.
- Remove the bowl from the stand mixer.
- Line a baking sheet with parchment paper.
- Trim off the edges of your cakes and use your hands to finely crumble the cake into a large bowl.
- Add 1 cup of the cream cheese frosting and mix to combine; let sit for 5 minutes.
- Using an ice cream scoop, portion the cake mixture into 36 balls and place on the prepared baking sheet.
- Chill in the refrigerator for about 30 minutes.
- This will help the balls stay together when you roll them.
- Assemble and coat your cake pops: Fill a medium saucepot with 2 inches of water and heat over medium heat.
- Set a large heatproof bowl on top and put the Candy Melts in the bowl.
- Heat, stirring, until they have melted, then add the canola oil until the coating is thinned enough for easy dipping.
- Stir to combine and turn off the heat.
- Remove the balls of cake from the refrigerator and roll each tightly into a smooth ball.
- Dip the lollipop sticks into the coating and, one at a time, insert a lollipop stick into the center of each ball, facing up.
- Once all of the cake pops have lollipop sticks in them, transfer the baking sheet to the freezer to set, about 10 minutes.
- Once set, remove from the freezer and allow to sit at room temperature for 5 minutes.
- (If there is too big a difference in temperature between your coating and the cake pop, it will cause the coating to crack.
- ) One at a time, dip the cake pops in the coating.
- In order to keep the cake pop nice and round as the coating sets, you can either place the cake pops in a low-sided glass dish, lollipop stick facing down, or (my preference) stick the lollipop stick into a piece of styrofoam and allow to dry standing upright.
- Decorate your cake pops as desired; red sprinkles, if used, should be sprinkled over the cake pops before the coating sets.
- If using a drizzle of melted chocolate, wait for the coating to set and then drizzle with chocolate.
- Allow to set completely and enjoy!
Notes / Tips / Wine Advice:
When rolling the cake balls, make sure to really mash together the cake dough. And use a lot of force between your hands to form tight balls. They will fall apart at first, but continue to roll, roll, roll, and they will come together.
If your Candy Melts are too thick, it will be difficult to dip the cake pop into the glaze and it may fall off the lollipop stick. Make sure the coating is thin enough to dip. To be safe, you can use a spoon and pour some of the coating over the cake pop, letting the excess drip into the bowl.
Want a shortcut? You can use a boxed cake mix and/or store-bought frosting to speed up the process. Not quick enough? Doughnut holes make a great cake pop substitute.
If your Candy Melts are too thick, it will be difficult to dip the cake pop into the glaze and it may fall off the lollipop stick. Make sure the coating is thin enough to dip. To be safe, you can use a spoon and pour some of the coating over the cake pop, letting the excess drip into the bowl.
Want a shortcut? You can use a boxed cake mix and/or store-bought frosting to speed up the process. Not quick enough? Doughnut holes make a great cake pop substitute.